@ the Brock Report

[imareporter]

Best welcome-to-the-village-we-may-be-stuck-here-forever gift ideas. Ready? Go.

Private to Tony Stark

...How are you feeling I uh may have a huge problem.

Comments

private

[nonstopnarcissist]

I'm alive? What's up.

[imareporter]

My ex-fiancee is here

She doesnt know that Venom is still alive

[nonstopnarcissist]

...and how long are you hoping to keep that genie in the bottle?

[imareporter]

I can't let her know that he's still alive. It'll put her in danger.

/2

[imareporter]

Honestly she's moved on. She's happier

she's got a boyfriend.

[nonstopnarcissist]

...none of what I said implied you should shack up with her or that she'd be in danger if she knew that Venom is still with you. Like. None of it.

Divorce your personal crisis from your lovelife for a second.

[imareporter]

Right.

Should not mention Dan.

[You can't blame me for this Eddie. Venom snorts, You want her back too...

In his house he's mumbling to himself. nononono but he lets that slide.]

Anne's the kind of girl who would tell everybody and set up patrols and ask if I was eating enough tho and she'd worry.

un: jane doe

[scathefires]

how about a nice bespoke corn husk doll

[nonstopnarcissist]

Then you get her early, explain how things are different for both of you here, that you've got a support network and make sure she doesn't kick up a fuss. Because mass panic? Not something we really want.

Re: un: jane doe

[imareporter]

She's not really a doll person.

[imareporter]

...Is this the kind of shit you guys deal with?

Like I dunno what if aliens or hydra or shield or whatever the fuck show up and take her in cause she's connected to me?

Plausible deniability's better.

[scathefires]

isnt it more the thought that counts anyway

[nonstopnarcissist]

Have you checked the village history? The only thing to roll up to the club here is a wendigo and it killed someone. No other organization is in play that's swung by for two years. Shield rolls up, we handle them. Hydra rolls up? We kill them. Hostile aliens roll up- we kill them.

Easy.

[imareporter]

[What he says. "I'll have your back. we'll have your back." What Eddie assumes he means. "Eddie. don't be a pussy bitch - The Six Million Dollar Man is correct. You must tell her. There is no shame in our joining.

Get out of my head snotball!

Oh god. He feels sick and there's a good five minutes before he replies.]

...Yeah okay. I mean.

She hosted Venom once too. She ought to know he's ...alive. I'm so sorry for dragging you into my bullshit.

[imareporter]

Yes but I'd like to prove myself useful which means, sadly, thoughts that work.

[scathefires]

cant really tell you how to be useful if i dont know your skill set

personally if someone i liked enough to give gifts showed up here the first thing id give them is a weapon of some kind but without knowing the recipient i cant really advise on that either

weapons are not one size fits all and we dont have a lot of em here anyway

[nonstopnarcissist]

Hey, what did I tell you when you first came by? I'm going to help you. If it's managing Venom's diet or helping you figure this out? No sweat.


Also she knows a little of what Venom needs so, hey. Another strut in your support network.

[imareporter]

Listen have you ever really loved somebody? Like...they were in your life and suddenly you wanted to change as a person? Y'know give up the bike, remember to pay your bills, maybe not invest in that awesome neon beer sign?

Then that person comes to their senses and realizes you're garbage for them so you try and let them go -

But then they show up in your alternate reality survivor-esque camping trip and you're worried you're gonna say the wrong thing because you still love them?

[nonstopnarcissist]

...Pep and I took a break- but we did get back together.

Anyone that walked away and stayed away generally had reason and I learned to get over it. Had to. There's too much that needs my attention, I don't really have time to fall apart so, I can't really help you figure out how to handle this one, Edster.

Be honest but don't be creepy. Respect the boundaries she puts out. Communicate, compromise, etc.

[imareporter]

[He's the weapon at this point. Good call.]

Trust me she can use a weapon. Just a matter of what. I once got death threats for covering a mafia story.

They found out about her and came to her place of work and she kneed one of them so bad he had to get surgery cause his dick split in two.

[imareporter]

[You see?! There is hope.

Listen to the 6 million dollar man. He knows what he's talking about. Eddie. even if, survival is what's paramount...

he shoves venom out of his mind.]


I'll make time. And not push.

[That's good advice.]

Venom says I should listen to you and that you're smart.

[scathefires]

sounds like she knows how to handle herself then

you might have a difficult time being useful at all

[nonstopnarcissist]

Well, I am a genius.

But social knowledge? That comes from a lot of trial and error. But as long as you talk and you're honest? Things tend to go better. Transparency is healthy in relationships, all that.

It's also possible to have a platonic relationship with someone you used to be romantically involved with, I've done it.

[imareporter]

I'm perfectly capable of having a platonic relationship too. Just Anne...

Fuck we were gonna be married.

I didn't think it'd bother me this much. Like fuckin' blood from a wound man.

[imareporter]

I am plenty useful. We're a team.