text | un: Spark Plug

[assemble_the_lovbacken]

Dear: Whomever Might Be Reading,

I know that this method of communication is not new for most of you, but it is unlike anything I've ever really used before. I have discovered that one can make crude little faces to express emotion, like this - (: and ):

This made me curious as to what other things related to this electronic way of "speaking" I am ignorant about. Are there other faces? Are there rules about what might be forbidden? I find myself with more time than I know what to do with, and so any distractions in the form of advice would be helpful.

Thank you!

Sincerely: Thor Odinson

Comments

[spoileralert]

Aww good work!

We have our moments. They don't really make up for everything else but they happen

[assemble_the_lovbacken]

I cannot say that we gods - or once gods, if I'm to be more accurate now - are much better. We simply have more time on our hands.

[spoileralert]

How does that work? I mean, humans can mean all sorts of things when they say 'god' but what does that mean about you in a practical sense?

or is that weird to ask, you don't have to answer if it's weird

[assemble_the_lovbacken]

It is not weird, I would be happy to answer you.

When I say god, I mean that my father, Odin, is, or WAS, the All-Father. We are granted abilities humans can only dream of and can never attain in their lives. We are not immortal in that we do not live forever, but we age at a much slower rate than mortals. I am 1,500 years old, for example. And when we do die, whether in battle or simply because we've reached the end of our lifespan, if we have lived as a hero or great warrior, or if we have earned our place, we ascend to Valhalla.

I have been told this is like your concept of "heaven," though I believe that's a religion unique to humans.

So, prior to my arrival here, I had many great powers! I am the God of Thunder and Lightning. With my hammer, Mjolnir, that could only be picked up by those worthy, I could harness and gain access to the wonders of lightning and thunder to vanquish my foes. I had amazing stamina, had immense strength, and did not often get injured. If I did, I healed rapidly. There were many other benefits to being a god, but I hope I've been a little clearer for you!

[spoileralert]

Oh, I think I get it! You're kind of like Superman, but on his home planet he was basically normal.

That's gotta suck, not being able to bench press a train anymore.

[assemble_the_lovbacken]

I don't know who this Superman is, but I like his name!

I miss my hammer, Mjolnir, more than whether or not I could lift a train. Although I do miss being able to lift trains. I miss my lightning and thunder. ):

[spoileralert]

I know... I miss coffee. That's basically a superpower

[assemble_the_lovbacken]

Coffee! I very much like coffee and had a lot of it when I first came to Midgard!

We don't have any here? ):

[spoileralert]

None. Fun fact: coffee is addictive and withdrawal is a bitch

[assemble_the_lovbacken]

I don't think I ever had enough to get addicted, but that is something to remember for the future, should we ever get some from whomever doles out gifts of addictive bean juice!

[spoileralert]

I'll be sure to let you know if we do :)

So how are you feeling about the whole texting thing now?

[assemble_the_lovbacken]

Thank you! That is very much appreciated.

Better, I think. I suppose that's a question I should ask you - how do you feel like I'm doing with the whole texting thing?

[spoileralert]

You seem to be a lot more comfortable with it. Emojis will take practice and observation, I think. You pass my beginner’s class. :)

[assemble_the_lovbacken]

Your kind words make me feel like this :D

I will wear that passing as the badge of honor that it is! Thank you!

[spoileralert]

Any time.