three >>> if i can live through this, i can do anything (video)

[expeditiousness]

un: SPEED

[if you know tommy, you know that his solemn expression here is fairly uncharacteristic. maybe this is what maturity looks like? because he's actually taking this pretty seriously.]

So ... I know we all have a lot we're dealing with here in the Village of Suck. Like, all those times people ended up getting poofed to weird places? That was irritating enough, but now there's actual kidnappings happening, right? So I was thinking ... a while back, during the winter, I'd talked with a guy here about setting up a good old-fashioned footrace once it warmed up. My idea was to do it for fun, but he said it would be a good way to figure out who here is fast enough to get emergency messages around to everyone. These wrist things are fine, if they're working. But if they suddenly crap out and we're under attack, we gotta have a way to alert everyone about it.

[he pauses, mouth pursed. this entire situation feels a little too much like being entirely powerless for tommy's liking. then again, who likes a game that's stacked against them?]

Back home, I've got super speed, so I can run really fast. If I could still do that, I wouldn't even be suggesting this, but here I'm just a regular snail like everyone else. I mean, I'm still pretty good at running, and I bet I can still outrun everyone else, so I guess that's my question - who here is the fastest? Is anyone faster than me? And who wants to find out?

[tommy gives the camera quick fingergun and a nod.]

Let me know.

Comments

UN: RankA

[skyward_eyes]

Damn, I really wish I could take you on in this, but it really wouldn't be a fair competition when I beat you.

[expeditiousness]

Psh. Keep dreaming, dude. I may not have super speed anymore but I'm still the fastest snail around!

[skyward_eyes]

I am. I picked up speed at that creepy Bunker vending machine. I'm faster than a normal human right now. So it literally would not be a fair race.

1/2; i’m sorry for nida’s ears

[expeditiousness]

[there’s a long couple of seconds of stunned silence, then:]

What?!!

[expeditiousness]

WHATDOYOUMEANthere’savendinggmachineinthebunker?!!

[deep breath, thomas!!]

You’re telling me I could’ve had my speed back at any time and none of you jerks told me?!!

[skyward_eyes]

[Hyne above that was some fucking fast talking. What the actual fuck? Like, almost faster than Selphie on energy drinks. He's shocked and impressed.]

I mean, it's not speed like you had, that much I'm sure of from how you talk about it. But it's definitely speed like I had with the proper junctions.

No one's told you about that? I just figured you didn't go to collect it because it was to slow and why deal with the claustrophobia of the place for a poor imitation?

Do... Do you want me to take you there?

[expeditiousness]

No. [he huffs loudly.] It’s fine. I can check it out myself.

[skyward_eyes]

I'm sorry. I didn't think about it, Tommy. I should have told you. Sorry I'm so terrible.

UN: Skateboard Sniper

[duel_wielding]

I won't win, but you can count me in. Sounds like a lot of fun and some great exercise!

[expeditiousness]

Racing's always more fun with other people, dude! I don't like not having my super speed, but I guess putting me on the same level as everyone else makes it a bigger challenge, right?

[duel_wielding]

And you seem like the kind of guy who would enjoy the challenge, right? I mean, I've got a lot of stamina, so if you haven't been training, then over distances I might knock you down a peg, Hare.

[expeditiousness]

[tommy just laughs.]

Are you kidding me? There’s nothing to do here except train. Not having super speed’s no excuse to slack off!

[duel_wielding]

I completely agree. Well, at least I might amuse. We'll see how far I get.