UN: Antivan Lover

[ombranera]

[ BEHOLD, Zevran lounging, somewhat, dressed comfortably as he's settled by the fire, wrist angled just so to make his angles all the more artful as he makes his most somber of faces into the camera. ]

I think the time has come to ask a very serious question of the Village.

[ The face drops and now, well, he is all smiles. ]

Is it just me or is place full to bursting with ridiculously sexy individuals? We have statuesque warriors, lithe scholars, voluptuous women, people in every glorious shade, size, and shape- and every last one of them incredibly attractive. I had thought to myself- 'Zevran, those in charge of this place must be turning away those with less than appealing faces' but no. Handsome men and gorgeous women all. I have tried to list out names and rate them but, alas, there are too many even for I to form an opinion.

Too many gorgeous people. Is that not a marvelous problem to have?

And so I turn to you, my fellow villagers. I ask for your aid because I simply cannot keep up with all the lovely people on my own. From a scale of "I would kiss them tomorrow" to "I would have them right now if they so wished", how would you rate the beautiful people of our Village?

In the interest of fairness- if you name a name? You must list what of them you find terribly attractive- what of them drives you to the point of distraction. I shall go first!

Kate - Such poise, such fire, such compassion to continue to feed the village every day for our luncheon meal, never asking thanks or consideration for her labors. She gives of her heart and her skills, minding the fires and tending to our lonely souls. A flame in the dark, she with glimmering eyes and so sweet a voice- and fiery temper, who wouldn't wish to spend a time by the hearth with her?

Shiro - A gallant man indeed, with a keen eye and a warm heart that seems terribly unaware of his own beauty, which is all the more a shame. He has a face that looks as though it were sculpted by artists, a broad strength to him that is beguiling- and a quiet sorrow that is enticing. Perhaps a night or two in pleasing company might lift his spirits? It is certainly worth a shot!

Anne - Now here is a woman with a taste for the finer things in life. She knows what it is that she wants and takes no prisoners in finding a way to get it. The fall of her hair, the flash of her eyes, the wicked curve of her lips? It does get the blood pumping, that is certain. She, well. She I would ask the favor of her favor and content myself with whatever I received.

Altaïr - For a man that certainly turns many a head without noticing, I must admit, I am baffled. How can one be so lovely and so utterly unaware of it? Has he not seen himself? How can anyone look upon that man and not be at least a little enchanted, if not enthralled? Those smoldering eyes, that sultry voice, the weight of wisdom; he I would have right now if he understood my flirtations.

[ OH WAIT HE ALMOST FORGOT TWO MORE ]

Elektra - Someone so fine, so fit, so lovely- with a richness to her voice and a mystery to her poise- ah, she brings to mind a Bard from Orlais, or any discerning lady of the Antivan Court. Someone with a beauty such as hers should be captured by painters, lauded by poets, she ought to turn the eye of a great many in the village. Were she free and of a mind? I'd lose days to her company.

Steven - Never before have I seen so quietly carved an adonis- with piercing eyes and skin so fair it does make one wonder how deeply he might blush- shoulders so broad and a waist so trim? I would climb him like a tree to rid him of this cloud of sorrow that clings to his shoulders. Perhaps he needs the right distraction, yes? And I am ever so good at being distracting.

Comments

Voice

[championofsnark]

[Hawke's very distinct voice.] I have not met an ugly person yet in this bloody place. I mean, yes, if I kidnapped a load of people, I would certainly take the best looking ones if I had a choice, but still!

Voice

[ombranera]

Have you no one you wish to submit for praise? You could, after all, laud my attractiveness while I did the same for you.

Video

[can_fight_ugly]

Makes me wonder what the end goal is if attractiveness is one of their priorities.

video; un: on board with this tho

[spoileralert]

Wow. You're really horny, huh.

UN: Antivan Lover

[ombranera]

Lonely, Mia Bella, the word is lonely. Tell me there aren't at least three people you'd spend a night with if you had your way?

video

[womanofvalue]

[ She's just going to stare, slightly disapprovingly, possibly very annoyed. ]

If you're so very flush with time to rhapsodize, would you like to come help gut today's fishing haul? At least you can be useful and prattle about wicked lips.

[ombranera]

If you think fishguts will prevent my admiration, Mia Dama, you are mistaken. Or is this a request to be rhapsodized in person?

Unrelated

[rebornpaladin]

I'd like to be involved with the fishing crew. My great great grandfather would probably be amused.

Video

[can_fight_ugly]

[Anne is listening to this post with a detached bemusement - she'd only met Zevran the once, so far, but she appreciated the flair he brought (and, of course, he had tamed her poor dry hair and that was to be commended).

To hear her own name called out is entirely unexpected, but given the circumstances she can only laugh brightly. Flattery will get you nowhere except that's a lie and she's needed this.]

Look at you, so beguiling and suave. If I didn't know any better I'd think you were trying to score a playmate for the night.

I feel like I've been tagged on Facebook or something. Let me think ... [She had met some very nice and very attractive people so far.]

I'd like to call attention to Franklin; hopefully he won't be too embarrassed if I do. To do what he does, you need nerves of steel, book smarts, street smarts, and the emotional intelligence to know the difference. And, he looks like the kind of guy that would give the best backrubs.

[ombranera]

It is all but the most humblest of truths, my dear. You are lovely and discerning and ought to know it! Anyone that leaves room for doubt is not worth your time.

[ Honestly, people need to compliment one another more. ]

I have not met this man but he sounds delightful! Why should he be embarrassed to have your attention, mm?

Voice

[skyward_eyes]

And here I thought when we first met you were just drunk to be that forward about your preferences. And now here I'm just wondering if there is ever a time when you don't speak your mind about this stuff, Zevran.

But you aren't wrong about how many unfairly attractive people there are in this place.

Let's see, with your list the only one I'm all that familiar with is Altaïr, and you know what, you haven't said nearly enough good things about Altaïr's voice. If you could bottle that and sell it as syrup a think a lot of people would want it poured on them. Just an observation. Can I say it's my job to notice those things? Seems a safe bet. Let's put him at kiss him now, without reservation. However I think he's the sort to let age differences figure in so...

Now you should add in Desmond, because he's a bit newer here and I don't know if you've seen him. Supposedly a distant relative of Altaïr's, and I've got to say that jawline? Wonderful. I've heard you do trims and shaves, Zevran, don't touch his facial hair. That bit of scruffiness can really be attractive in its own way. Can we have kiss him tonight on this scale? Like, between 'kiss them tomorrow' and 'have them now' on the scale.

But you know whose name you're really missing there?

Zevran Arainai. A man who not only knows his assets, but knows them well enough to display them with such an artist's eye. And, from his own stories, has a way with his mouth. Another man with a rich voice you want wrapped up in, and the smile? Sharp as your tongue and your wit. How about rating him as a 'would really love to see how sensitive those ears are'. And since the scale is time based let's use 'whenever agreeable to him.'

[Regrets are for situations way less crazy than this.]

[ombranera]

Why not be open about such things? Is there a point to playing coy over who one does or does not prefer to keep in their company? I have found it lengthens the chase and not in a way that is at all enjoyable, so I do not bother.

Mmm...fair point. I could listen to him all day, perhaps I should record him speaking sometime to keep me company while I am working through frigid waters and fishguts-

Is it truly a thing? The age issue. Should I...not flirt quite so blatantly with those below a certain age?

[ Once is odd, twice is a pattern. Perhaps he...shouldn't? But what is the cut off? Is there a rule? He hopes there's a rule. ]

Kiss tonight very much belongs on the scale. It's a fluid thing all the same, no more weight given than truly ought to be-

Ah, you flatter me. Go on. Forever. And if you are so curious- I am at the hearth in the Inn for the evening.

un: loser

[killorder]

I'm so going to get my ass kicked for this but... I submit Cougar Alvarez. He is beautiful. Tall and muscled with rich skin and silky hair you just want to run your fingers through and a smile that when you get it just fucking burns it's so perfect. And his eyes are dark and you can just read everything in them if you know what you're looking at. And he has these cheekbones that are like fucking sharp enough to cut. He doesn't talk much but when he does, he has this soft voice and the sexiest accent.

And that's not even the sexiest things about him. He is literally the most competent person I know. He is calm, steady and fucking amazing at what he does. He moves like a damn cat, all slink and sleek and quiet.

There's just never a question that he's always got your six, and he will never miss, and there is something about all of that which is sexier than any movie star or pin up I've ever seen. He's like statues of gods I've seen in Greece... and I'm so going into hiding after sending these. Bye.

voice

[championofsnark]

Okay I have a few questions.

How do I find him to propose?

Does he mind if you join us?

Also it's adorable you're saying such nice things about your own lover, darling. Well done you!

[ombranera]

Is this the man that I made you oh so terribly delicious for? In which case I am glad to have put in some of my best work- not that you needed it aside from the trimming. You've a loveliness all your own, Pinga, and I must say it sounds as though you make a terribly attractive couple.

UN: التاير

[eaglesonofnone]

من فضلك ، صديق ، وهذا هو أكثر من أي منا يمكن التعامل معها.

UN: التاير

[ombranera]

Begging your pardon, Ser, but-


What?

Video: UN: Earp

[unraisehell]

Wow. That was smooth as fuck, my man, I am impressed. Not everyone could get away with hitting on that many people at once. Bravo.

[ombranera]

My dear, I have not yet begun to flirt.

You, now, look like a marvelous firecracker of a woman. Am I wrong?

voice; un: jane doe

[scathefires]

... What the hell is wrong with you people?

Voice

[ombranera]

Absolutely nothing. What is wrong with you that you find this discussion so strange?

voice, un: rogers

[ex_enlisted288]

I -- what?

Voice

[ombranera]

You are unaware of your own handsomeness and I am hoping to correct that for you! People find you terribly pretty, Ser. Enjoy it!

audio; un: d.pavus

[tevinteraltus]

Winter coming, questions of the origin of food and warmth on everyone's minds, and this is where yours travels? I suppose one must have his priorities.

Voice

[ombranera]

I can do nothing for food aside from fish and hunt but warmth? There I might help others find a companion for the night. The amount of people in this village that are stubbornly ignorant of their own beauty and that of those around them is staggering.

Text

[mediumhoodie]

It sounds like you have too much time on your hands.

Voice

[ombranera]

Is the concept of performing multiple tasks whilst speaking so strange?

video; un: Odair65

[fishermansweater]

[ Let it be said: Finnick Odair is a beautiful man. It's the main source of his fame, and was the strategic advantage he played all the way to victory in the 65th Hunger Games.

And he knows it, and how to play it to his advantage, which is why he looks a little pouty when his face appears on the screen. ]

I'd be offended to be left off your list, but we haven't formally met yet.

[ombranera]

Alas, no, otherwise I never would've left you out, fair Ser. Who may I ask do I have the pleasure of speaking to, so I might correct my most grievous error?

Video;

[cleptes]

Are there any rules about submitting oneself as a candidate?

[ So shameless. ]

[ombranera]

You know? I cannot think of a single reason why not. Submit away, Mia Bella.

un: olive oil

[blacksky]

How kind of you to notice.

Voice

[ombranera]

How could I not? Even a blind man would surely admire your poise, your beauty.

text | un: spark plug

[assemble_the_lovbacken]

):

Voice

[ombranera]

I mean no disrespect, Thor but truly you are already aware of your own masculine beauty, are you not?