Sixth Iteration

[Kamala starts the video in the style of every cute teen Youtuber: with a wave and sincere smile before adjusting her hair for the millionth time.] Hey, guys! So I wanted to touch base with you on stuff so please watch this. You're helping in the name of science or something. Still watching? Good.

[She takes a deep breath and gets to it.] Alright so spoiler alert if you've been living under a rock: we have color-coded superpowers! Sometimes other stuff, but mostly color-coded! If this is new to you and very confusing, please look back at Mayor Hotdog's post on the subject. If you didn't save it or weren't around when he broke some stuff down for us, that's okay! I saved it and will forward the video to everyone who wants it.

So okay! I'm green which means my power to make my skin super tough and share that power with my friends... or friend. I usually give it to Frank when we go hunting.

I used to only be able to do it when things got super scary. Like a week or maybe two weeks ago, Frank was like, 'Sweetheart, can you do the thing???' or something like that. [Yes, she really tried to mimic Frank's gravelly voice for accuracy's sake. It's as hilarious as you think it would be.] Look I don't write this stuff down. And I was like, "I can try?? I don't feel really scared right now!' and then I did it without being scared at all! It was so cool. I've been experimenting with it ever since. I thought I'd share my findings with you guys now that I've made some decent progress. Share whatever you've found out about below!

Here it goes: [DRAMATIC PAUSE] It definitely lasts up to ten minutes. I tested this by poking myself with something sharp for every minute at home. [She holds up her right forearm with the tiniest speck of dry blood on it.] I drew blood on eleventh one in the name of science. I've touched Frank in the past during our hunting trips, but turns out it's not necessary! He just has to stand nearby. So far I've been able to share my power with him from up to roughly fifteen feet away. We took it foot by foot, but in the heat of battle or hunting, you're not going to be able to do that so just note you can do it from a distance! I think we hit the limit on how far we can go, but I could still use volunteers for how many people I can share this with and what happens to me when I hit that limit. Does this power come from my lifeforce or is it from our wristwatches??? Things to think about! Maybe just one person at a time in case it is a lifeforce thing? I don't want to slip into a coma from hitting a limit too hard.

[She clearly takes that as serious risk. Kamala looks lost in her thoughts for a second before snapping back cheerfully and with painful sincerity. What she has to share next is important.] That about does it for me. I hope this helps and remember! It's super important to figure out how to control your powers. 4 out of 10 villain origin stories begin with, 'I lost control and my sister died! Or she's in some crazy coma!' No one needs a dead person or coma backstory. Figure it out! And remember that it's a personal thing. I couldn't explain to you how I do this. It's like breathing to me. It's probably different for you and you owe to yourself to find out.

Oh and standard warning to potential crazies in our midst who hate people with abilities: congrats on joining us. Please don't start some insane mission to wipe us out and then yourself because God told you to do it. I speak to God five times a day so I can promise you He definitely didn't! He'll probably express His disapproval in the form of a tall and scary man if you come at me. Bye. [She ends the video with a wave.]